admit it.
life is difficult.
it can be too hard on you
it sometimes throws you off the side of a cliff straight into the harsh-cold-raging waters
that will smash you on to the rocks.
my top 5 survival guide tips.
(please don't quote me on anything, or blame me for whatever)
5. Choose the people you surround yourself with.
Relationships can be complicated,
whether it be with relatives,
friends -
or even the ones with the opposite sex.
it takes effort to maintain relationships
you go out of your way
you act nice
you even change things
so, it better be worth it.
and if it does you more harm than good,
why bother?
just walk away.
don't let people pull you down
don't let anyone (peers, lovers,bystanders) mistreat you in any way
in life, loving yourself is the first rule
because if you don't
you really can't expect others to do it for you.
i'm not saying you should be selfish or self-involved.
just try to be wise in dealing with people around you
it's great to be kind
but allowing yourself to be abused,
now. that. is. stupidity.
4. Take time to smell the flowers.
take time to feel the wind blow your hair all over your face
take time for a walk even on your own.
LITTLE things matter BIG.
the cliche, 'the best things in life are free'...
well, there's truth to it, you know
insisting on things that just isn't there will just keep you miserable longer
instead, try to focus on things that ARE already there
even the tiniest details that we ignore
make a big difference when we start taking notice.
3. Be a toughie.
be a tough nut to crack.
or at least, act in a pretentious nonchalance
or act cunningly confident
because when you act weak, you get taken advantaged of
when you act like a softie,
people start walking all over you
don't think for a bit that people would take pity on you
nobody likes a cry-baby
everybody tries to get rid of a clinger
people will see you as their equal if you SHOW them that you are
i don't know about you but i'd rather be feared than be bullied.
one wise guy said (actually its George from Grey's Anatomy):
'show no weakness and you'll go straight to the top'.
(or something like that)
2. Decide to be happy.
the old adage that says, 'happiness is a choice', is true.
it is indeed subjective and relative.
don't let the little things bother you
coz' you cannot control everything
but you can definitely control how you react to things
inordinate happiness is a good thing (watch Robbie Williams' movie 'Patch Adams')
even if there seem to be no reason to be happy about
i think this is one of the hardest things to do
because it requires a certain maturity
and strength of willpower
but it's also the simplest solution
just. be. happy.
don't let life get the best of you
instead, get the best out of life.
1. Count your blessings.
(I do this almost every time i ride a bus now.
because it keeps my sanity intact)
you never know just how blessed you are unless you start counting
even in your darkest moments
try hard and just start counting
you'll be surprised.
Pray HARD.
thank God for these blessings.
you'll never know what hit you.
-----
these are just my opinions
but it wont hurt you to try
i came up with these because my life has never been this challenging before
i've never had to experience too many new things in such a short span of time
and i've never had to make these much adjustments until now
i admit that i'm terrified pretty much all day everyday
there are lots of times that i don't even know what i'm doing or where i'm going
but i no longer bother to complain
because i think all these will be worth it in the end
i believe these all will make me a better person.
it's all in perspective you see.
it's a decision you make to survive.
Monday 21 January 2008
Friday 18 January 2008
of competition and purpose
(just a bit of self-evaluation)
i don't believe that i have even a bit of competitive streak
but its omnipresence isn't lost on me.
even before in school, i see people competing for honours,
friends and boyfriends and even attention
looking back,
i think i was more of a wallflower
im there but i didn't really count that much
i have no regrets, i enjoyed my high school life immensely
and with any chance of re-living it, i wouldn't change myself much
when i reached college
i consciously persevered harder
but not in the name of competition
not even for the marks
i worked hard because it provides me with purpose
because it makes me feel good
people asked me if i studied for a recitation, and i'll most definitely 'no'
they asked me for my grade later, and i have good grades
this makes me giddily happy
and plasters a smile on my face for hours after
and puts a spring on my steps
makes all the hard work worth it
to prove each and everytime that hard work does pay off
i keep it a secret that i study hard not to deceive
but i don't want them to think that im part of the game
i didn't want to draw attention to myself
i have my own silent mission
and it has absolutely nothing to do with theirs
i just wanted to be happy and content with myself
and a sense of purpose does the trick
call me selfish, because it really is self-serving
but i want a balanced life
i don't obsess over the marks themselves
i don't need my peers' acceptance that i am one of them intelligent ones
its enough that i have a bit of their respect
now, the competition stakes have been raised
its now all about 'the money', 'the power' and 'the success'
it still doesn't work for me
i still don't work to win
i set my own goals because it provides me with purpose
and because purpose makes me happy
i still do things for ME, ultimately
because i don't need people to take notice
i don't need people to approve
i don't need people's envy
because my existence is not so i can compete
but to find my purpose in life.
i don't believe that i have even a bit of competitive streak
but its omnipresence isn't lost on me.
even before in school, i see people competing for honours,
friends and boyfriends and even attention
looking back,
i think i was more of a wallflower
im there but i didn't really count that much
i have no regrets, i enjoyed my high school life immensely
and with any chance of re-living it, i wouldn't change myself much
when i reached college
i consciously persevered harder
but not in the name of competition
not even for the marks
i worked hard because it provides me with purpose
because it makes me feel good
people asked me if i studied for a recitation, and i'll most definitely 'no'
they asked me for my grade later, and i have good grades
this makes me giddily happy
and plasters a smile on my face for hours after
and puts a spring on my steps
makes all the hard work worth it
to prove each and everytime that hard work does pay off
i keep it a secret that i study hard not to deceive
but i don't want them to think that im part of the game
i didn't want to draw attention to myself
i have my own silent mission
and it has absolutely nothing to do with theirs
i just wanted to be happy and content with myself
and a sense of purpose does the trick
call me selfish, because it really is self-serving
but i want a balanced life
i don't obsess over the marks themselves
i don't need my peers' acceptance that i am one of them intelligent ones
its enough that i have a bit of their respect
now, the competition stakes have been raised
its now all about 'the money', 'the power' and 'the success'
it still doesn't work for me
i still don't work to win
i set my own goals because it provides me with purpose
and because purpose makes me happy
i still do things for ME, ultimately
because i don't need people to take notice
i don't need people to approve
i don't need people's envy
because my existence is not so i can compete
but to find my purpose in life.
Wednesday 9 January 2008
they say it's a nightmare...
i think this day rocks!
the feedback for the 2 papers i've turned in before christmas are out. well, they are not the actual grade per se because they still go into deliberation at Glamorgan University but im happy with what i got. i know i should work on getting a distinction. but it could really be hard specially now with setting myself up in my new job.
since my instructors knew about my new job they asked me about it...and i told them that i kinda need to get to know everything about UK, the legal system, the benefits system, the laws on housing, on employment and everything else really... and my ops management instructor said; "oh...that's a nightmare!'
yes, indeed...
it is.
what im trying to do is really damn difficult. but i just have to try . and i'll work really hard on it too.
i just hope that it will be good enough.
well, so while waiting for the final grades to come out in june, i'll starting with new MSc modules next wednesday and busy myself with my new job.
Top 5 ways to survive all these:
Top 5 : wake up early and stay up late
- yeah, right!
Top 4: stop watching friends reruns, smallville reruns, UK daily top10, cbbc cartoons,
and study instead
- again, really?!
Top 3 : stop spending too much time tinkering with the laptop, stop updating my friendster profile, my multiply profile, stop downloading songs and looking for gossip. also, stop updating this blog!
- i don't think this is possible...
Top 2 : start eating on time, especially lunch! - i haven't been doing this because i have no time
- ok i'll try
Top 1 : Pray a lot, and hard.
- this is definitely something i will do.
the feedback for the 2 papers i've turned in before christmas are out. well, they are not the actual grade per se because they still go into deliberation at Glamorgan University but im happy with what i got. i know i should work on getting a distinction. but it could really be hard specially now with setting myself up in my new job.
since my instructors knew about my new job they asked me about it...and i told them that i kinda need to get to know everything about UK, the legal system, the benefits system, the laws on housing, on employment and everything else really... and my ops management instructor said; "oh...that's a nightmare!'
yes, indeed...
it is.
what im trying to do is really damn difficult. but i just have to try . and i'll work really hard on it too.
i just hope that it will be good enough.
well, so while waiting for the final grades to come out in june, i'll starting with new MSc modules next wednesday and busy myself with my new job.
Top 5 ways to survive all these:
Top 5 : wake up early and stay up late
- yeah, right!
Top 4: stop watching friends reruns, smallville reruns, UK daily top10, cbbc cartoons,
and study instead
- again, really?!
Top 3 : stop spending too much time tinkering with the laptop, stop updating my friendster profile, my multiply profile, stop downloading songs and looking for gossip. also, stop updating this blog!
- i don't think this is possible...
Top 2 : start eating on time, especially lunch! - i haven't been doing this because i have no time
- ok i'll try
Top 1 : Pray a lot, and hard.
- this is definitely something i will do.
Tuesday 8 January 2008
knackered
i feel both great and exhausted today
its officially my first day at work
and since im behind schedule on my MSc work, i have to do school stuff
as well as cook dinner when i got home
there's really much to say
but i can't go on right now.
so my top 5 for today will be on the highlights of my day but, without much explanation
top 5 : waking up in a very un-Godly hour -- and here that's 6am
and i snoozed my alarm at least 5 times before i got my butt to move
top 4 : walking to the bus stop before break of dawn - and that's 8am here
it was raining and all, but since it was really dark and freezing cold this morning,
i think Rhyl looks very peaceful early in the morning
top 3 : meeting tons of people from my new work because they're adorable and lovely and inspiring
- although im still having a hard time remembering everybody's name
top 2 : riding a 2-door-topdown, sports car mercedez (although we had the top on cause its winter)
nice...hot car...
'nuff said
top 1 : finishing question #5 of my finance paper
that left me with not much energy. so im off, for now.
its officially my first day at work
and since im behind schedule on my MSc work, i have to do school stuff
as well as cook dinner when i got home
there's really much to say
but i can't go on right now.
so my top 5 for today will be on the highlights of my day but, without much explanation
top 5 : waking up in a very un-Godly hour -- and here that's 6am
and i snoozed my alarm at least 5 times before i got my butt to move
top 4 : walking to the bus stop before break of dawn - and that's 8am here
it was raining and all, but since it was really dark and freezing cold this morning,
i think Rhyl looks very peaceful early in the morning
top 3 : meeting tons of people from my new work because they're adorable and lovely and inspiring
- although im still having a hard time remembering everybody's name
top 2 : riding a 2-door-topdown, sports car mercedez (although we had the top on cause its winter)
nice...hot car...
'nuff said
top 1 : finishing question #5 of my finance paper
that left me with not much energy. so im off, for now.
Monday 7 January 2008
silver linings
i feel very blessed today.
considering i was so worried yesterday about it (to the point that i hardly slept at all) i feel relieved and really thankful that i got through it without any huge hitches.
in lieu of this, i would like to dedicate this entry to God (cause i knew He's going to check it out, and also because i know that He definitely laughed with me on my funny moments today)
so here i go... the top 5 reasons why i feel very grateful today:
5: i was supposed to show up at work today, not really to get any work done but just so i can have a word with my line manager... since i still haven't got my own premises keys (cause im going to be having my own set, you see) i was really stressed how i'll get in (and not everybody knows me yet) when i got to the door my boss was just letting herself in which solved the problem, and made things really easy
on top of that, i was able to tell her that my National Insurance Number (which is a requisite for working in the UK) is still in process and i was worried i might get in default or might not be allowed to work... she assured me that as long as i have applied for it already there shouldn't be any problem...its just that my pay might be delayed (instead of getting my first pay by the end of january, i will wait till end of february) which will actually work better for me, because that way i won't get my hands on it and all of it spend on nonsense
my line manager also assured me that everything will be sorted out tomorrow so i shouldn't really worry.
sigh...i felt really light headed after i left (i just pray that my stint at work tomorrow would be as stress-free) at least i know quite well what to expect for tomorrow because i'll be spending the whole day in our Denbigh office.
4: so i headed straight to the station to catch my bus to school...at the waiting area, i was very thrilled to find my friend carol already waiting and that the bus is just about to leave. this really is something to be thankful about because the weather today IS (cause it still is) quite unbearable (its about 4c and the wind is really having a go at blowing everything away). so a need to wait another ten minutes for the bus could easily translate into more frost-bitten toes (i've got quite a lot already and doesn't fancy more, thank you very much)
3: on my first class back; 'Working and Living in the UK', i was happy to learn that the instructor will be helping us out with work in our courses (cause all international students are doing unique stuff) every monday and all we need to do is bring some work in and ask her about it. i just hope that when i go next week and show her my finance assignment she can enlighten me. because im still very much in the dark.
there's also a new guy from vietnam, he's called 'Huey' or something. he said he just arrived after new year's and i just feel very lucky that i didn't have to start in the middle of the year like he is doing because it's just harder to cope that way. im proud to say that we were all really nice to him and showed him around. i think he's still in shock because i later found him sitting alone in front on the reception area. i really hope he'll be fine though...
he reminded me of myself when i arrived back in october and the class has been going on for 3 weeks already (the release of my visa was late, not my own fault at all) and i'm just glad that i settled in really well (with school stuff and submitting work on time, meeting and befriending people and finding a job)
it's a wonder how noticing things can now make me realize how good life has been treating me. (thanks to the new vietnamese guy for making me think at all,because i've been feeling down since the new year started last week)
2: i'm supposed to hand in a paper on my 2nd class for the day which is called "World Cuisine". so the moment i had the chance i sat in front of the computer and tried to access my finished work from my flash drive (because i don't have a printer at home). i used a 2007 version of MS Word because i was able to download a trial pack online for free. imagine how my face drained with colour when i cannot open the document because it was not compatible with the word processor installed in the computer we have in that classroom (all classrooms in this school have at least 7 desktops). i tried to convert it but all i got were lots of tiny squares. i really didn't know what to do.
i tried to calm myself enough to take in some food for lunch. then i decided to just talk to my instructor and tell them the truth. so i went to the kitchens and it was stroke of luck that he was passing the corridor. and i told him about my dilemma.
he said that there isn't a problem because he was planning to use the class time to do a workshop on the assignment for everyone and that the deadline have been extended till friday. he said that if i want to take the day off, he'll excuse me from class since i have it done anyway and that i can hand it in on wednesday (see...not all chefs are grumpy and insufferable).
although he was really rather nice about it, i still feel a little bad because i spent time on it and it was really finished and i was looking forward to handing it in today. but carol said not to worry about it anymore, so i stopped (worrying, that is) and we went to Llandudno to while away the time and checked out the sale there
1: when we returned to the college, we met with sheena (who i was doing the 'World Cuisine' class with) and i told her im not coming to class because of the technical problem with my work. she proceeded on effectively convincing me to come. she said it really doesn't matter if i hand it in today anyway...so i ended up promising her that okay, i'll catch up with her in class just as long as i can take a few minutes to run to the HE (higher education) room, where they have better and faster computers to try to print it again.
so i went. when i got there, most of my world cuisine classmates where doing their work on the paper. and so i knew that its okay to be late for it for just this one time...
i tried to open it using yahoo mail (because i sent it as an email attachment to myself) and i was able to get a preview of it. so what i did was just copied it to a blank word document and printed it!
then i was running off again...this time to the kitchens with my paper, hot off the printer and ready to be handed in...(yipee, relief, sigh. sigh... it was really exhilarating)
and when Chef Hindley browsed through it he said it was actually pretty good...(yay!!!)
i did it.
another assignment out of the way
now, i can focus on the last 2 (work assignments) from last term that i have to hand in this month (that is, on top of tons of reading and training materials that i still have to finish for work)
but it's all good. one day have passed. a really fine day at that
... another 24 days and its half term break again
(there's 10 weeks to 1 term, and we get one week off after the first 5 weeks)
so, thank God for this day. i couldn't have survived without Him providing me with strokes of silver linings on this rain drenched day.
considering i was so worried yesterday about it (to the point that i hardly slept at all) i feel relieved and really thankful that i got through it without any huge hitches.
in lieu of this, i would like to dedicate this entry to God (cause i knew He's going to check it out, and also because i know that He definitely laughed with me on my funny moments today)
so here i go... the top 5 reasons why i feel very grateful today:
5: i was supposed to show up at work today, not really to get any work done but just so i can have a word with my line manager... since i still haven't got my own premises keys (cause im going to be having my own set, you see) i was really stressed how i'll get in (and not everybody knows me yet) when i got to the door my boss was just letting herself in which solved the problem, and made things really easy
on top of that, i was able to tell her that my National Insurance Number (which is a requisite for working in the UK) is still in process and i was worried i might get in default or might not be allowed to work... she assured me that as long as i have applied for it already there shouldn't be any problem...its just that my pay might be delayed (instead of getting my first pay by the end of january, i will wait till end of february) which will actually work better for me, because that way i won't get my hands on it and all of it spend on nonsense
my line manager also assured me that everything will be sorted out tomorrow so i shouldn't really worry.
sigh...i felt really light headed after i left (i just pray that my stint at work tomorrow would be as stress-free) at least i know quite well what to expect for tomorrow because i'll be spending the whole day in our Denbigh office.
4: so i headed straight to the station to catch my bus to school...at the waiting area, i was very thrilled to find my friend carol already waiting and that the bus is just about to leave. this really is something to be thankful about because the weather today IS (cause it still is) quite unbearable (its about 4c and the wind is really having a go at blowing everything away). so a need to wait another ten minutes for the bus could easily translate into more frost-bitten toes (i've got quite a lot already and doesn't fancy more, thank you very much)
3: on my first class back; 'Working and Living in the UK', i was happy to learn that the instructor will be helping us out with work in our courses (cause all international students are doing unique stuff) every monday and all we need to do is bring some work in and ask her about it. i just hope that when i go next week and show her my finance assignment she can enlighten me. because im still very much in the dark.
there's also a new guy from vietnam, he's called 'Huey' or something. he said he just arrived after new year's and i just feel very lucky that i didn't have to start in the middle of the year like he is doing because it's just harder to cope that way. im proud to say that we were all really nice to him and showed him around. i think he's still in shock because i later found him sitting alone in front on the reception area. i really hope he'll be fine though...
he reminded me of myself when i arrived back in october and the class has been going on for 3 weeks already (the release of my visa was late, not my own fault at all) and i'm just glad that i settled in really well (with school stuff and submitting work on time, meeting and befriending people and finding a job)
it's a wonder how noticing things can now make me realize how good life has been treating me. (thanks to the new vietnamese guy for making me think at all,because i've been feeling down since the new year started last week)
2: i'm supposed to hand in a paper on my 2nd class for the day which is called "World Cuisine". so the moment i had the chance i sat in front of the computer and tried to access my finished work from my flash drive (because i don't have a printer at home). i used a 2007 version of MS Word because i was able to download a trial pack online for free. imagine how my face drained with colour when i cannot open the document because it was not compatible with the word processor installed in the computer we have in that classroom (all classrooms in this school have at least 7 desktops). i tried to convert it but all i got were lots of tiny squares. i really didn't know what to do.
i tried to calm myself enough to take in some food for lunch. then i decided to just talk to my instructor and tell them the truth. so i went to the kitchens and it was stroke of luck that he was passing the corridor. and i told him about my dilemma.
he said that there isn't a problem because he was planning to use the class time to do a workshop on the assignment for everyone and that the deadline have been extended till friday. he said that if i want to take the day off, he'll excuse me from class since i have it done anyway and that i can hand it in on wednesday (see...not all chefs are grumpy and insufferable).
although he was really rather nice about it, i still feel a little bad because i spent time on it and it was really finished and i was looking forward to handing it in today. but carol said not to worry about it anymore, so i stopped (worrying, that is) and we went to Llandudno to while away the time and checked out the sale there
1: when we returned to the college, we met with sheena (who i was doing the 'World Cuisine' class with) and i told her im not coming to class because of the technical problem with my work. she proceeded on effectively convincing me to come. she said it really doesn't matter if i hand it in today anyway...so i ended up promising her that okay, i'll catch up with her in class just as long as i can take a few minutes to run to the HE (higher education) room, where they have better and faster computers to try to print it again.
so i went. when i got there, most of my world cuisine classmates where doing their work on the paper. and so i knew that its okay to be late for it for just this one time...
i tried to open it using yahoo mail (because i sent it as an email attachment to myself) and i was able to get a preview of it. so what i did was just copied it to a blank word document and printed it!
then i was running off again...this time to the kitchens with my paper, hot off the printer and ready to be handed in...(yipee, relief, sigh. sigh... it was really exhilarating)
and when Chef Hindley browsed through it he said it was actually pretty good...(yay!!!)
i did it.
another assignment out of the way
now, i can focus on the last 2 (work assignments) from last term that i have to hand in this month (that is, on top of tons of reading and training materials that i still have to finish for work)
but it's all good. one day have passed. a really fine day at that
... another 24 days and its half term break again
(there's 10 weeks to 1 term, and we get one week off after the first 5 weeks)
so, thank God for this day. i couldn't have survived without Him providing me with strokes of silver linings on this rain drenched day.
Sunday 6 January 2008
adjectives
i know that i can be described in a million different ways. after all, just about anybody can have a slightly different opinion about me from everybody else.
i myself have a slightly oblique perception of who i am
i've decided to waste a single, perfectly innocent blog entry to discuss just that.
i now present to you the top five words that oddly (and i dare add, honestly) describe me.
5: ambitious.
this is a term that is currently seen in a negative light
it can lead to self destruction and fatality at its worst
on the other hand, it can lead to success.
i call myself ambitious because i want a lot of things (that are often hard to achieve)
i see the world as the perfect stage to test my limits
and i see life as the perfect excuse to keep trying
and am stubbornly goal driven
4: fickle-minded
synonymous almost to inconsistency
or instability.
i would have loved to say that i am cunningly fixed and stable. but i'm not.
i change dispositions at a whim
my opinion today may be entirely different from what my opinions would be tomorrow
i wish i could tone this down or control this though,
because i often find myself changing lanes because i've once again changed my mind on what i want
3: am 'high-maintenance'
i wish i could brag that i am simple
or that i am a cowboy.
but i can't.
i have naturally expensive taste on almost everything. (although i can't afford them)
i enjoy the finer things in life
to me, there is nothing fun in roughing it up in climbing mountains or going camping.
fun to me would mean luxury (which of course, i cannot afford again)
i am in constant need of attention, caring and concern (but i'm capable of giving this as well)
they say that people who are high maint are insecure.
maybe there's truth to that. in some aspects. (but not entirely)
(life here agrees with me because it is normal to buy a pack of already-grated-or-sliced cheese, drinking juice means pouring it from a box and not spooning powder into a glass, veggies and fruits are already sliced and ready to eat -- and lots of other conveniences...these examples only mean being high maintenance also mean i'm freaking LAZY!)
2: jologs
again, i wish im more of a sophisticated but i'm not.
because as much as i like indie films and intelli films
i also like tagalog films.
i don't care being seen getting out of a movie house after i watched something from Star Cinema
while those with more 'refined'-taste Filipinos claim they don't watch these kinds, i really do.
i am a fan of anne curtis and sarah geronimo
i like following teleseryes
and listen to OPM, a lot.
and looked forward to watching ASAP and the Buzz every Sunday
i watched sarah's concert last August and if i hadn't already left, i would also have gone to the erik santos' concert last October.
i'm not ashamed of this aspect of myself. it's just that i don't know a lot of people who i can share and enjoy these with.
however, i believe being jologs is part of the uber-rich Pinoy culture.
these things can be found only in the Philippines, and nowhere else.
and admitting I AM jologs only mean that im one proud Pinay.
1: complicated
i am indeed a bunch of complications that border on complexity
to try to explain this would give rise to a whole new list of adjectives and their accompanying antonyms.
some people have a hard time liking me because of this. (yeah. some people can't even stand me)
my personality could vary depending on my mood.
i can be as good as an angel or an insufferable bitch
im not proud of being complicated. i just accept that its just the way i am.
wiser men say that the first phase of changing or improving is awareness that there's need for it.
well, i may be aware.
but i may not want to change.
being self-aware is only important to me in as much as it allows me to soften my rough edges a bit
or to decide which way to react or to act (in certain scenarios)
its a self-preservation thing.
i myself have a slightly oblique perception of who i am
i've decided to waste a single, perfectly innocent blog entry to discuss just that.
i now present to you the top five words that oddly (and i dare add, honestly) describe me.
5: ambitious.
this is a term that is currently seen in a negative light
it can lead to self destruction and fatality at its worst
on the other hand, it can lead to success.
i call myself ambitious because i want a lot of things (that are often hard to achieve)
i see the world as the perfect stage to test my limits
and i see life as the perfect excuse to keep trying
and am stubbornly goal driven
4: fickle-minded
synonymous almost to inconsistency
or instability.
i would have loved to say that i am cunningly fixed and stable. but i'm not.
i change dispositions at a whim
my opinion today may be entirely different from what my opinions would be tomorrow
i wish i could tone this down or control this though,
because i often find myself changing lanes because i've once again changed my mind on what i want
3: am 'high-maintenance'
i wish i could brag that i am simple
or that i am a cowboy.
but i can't.
i have naturally expensive taste on almost everything. (although i can't afford them)
i enjoy the finer things in life
to me, there is nothing fun in roughing it up in climbing mountains or going camping.
fun to me would mean luxury (which of course, i cannot afford again)
i am in constant need of attention, caring and concern (but i'm capable of giving this as well)
they say that people who are high maint are insecure.
maybe there's truth to that. in some aspects. (but not entirely)
(life here agrees with me because it is normal to buy a pack of already-grated-or-sliced cheese, drinking juice means pouring it from a box and not spooning powder into a glass, veggies and fruits are already sliced and ready to eat -- and lots of other conveniences...these examples only mean being high maintenance also mean i'm freaking LAZY!)
2: jologs
again, i wish im more of a sophisticated but i'm not.
because as much as i like indie films and intelli films
i also like tagalog films.
i don't care being seen getting out of a movie house after i watched something from Star Cinema
while those with more 'refined'-taste Filipinos claim they don't watch these kinds, i really do.
i am a fan of anne curtis and sarah geronimo
i like following teleseryes
and listen to OPM, a lot.
and looked forward to watching ASAP and the Buzz every Sunday
i watched sarah's concert last August and if i hadn't already left, i would also have gone to the erik santos' concert last October.
i'm not ashamed of this aspect of myself. it's just that i don't know a lot of people who i can share and enjoy these with.
however, i believe being jologs is part of the uber-rich Pinoy culture.
these things can be found only in the Philippines, and nowhere else.
and admitting I AM jologs only mean that im one proud Pinay.
1: complicated
i am indeed a bunch of complications that border on complexity
to try to explain this would give rise to a whole new list of adjectives and their accompanying antonyms.
some people have a hard time liking me because of this. (yeah. some people can't even stand me)
my personality could vary depending on my mood.
i can be as good as an angel or an insufferable bitch
im not proud of being complicated. i just accept that its just the way i am.
wiser men say that the first phase of changing or improving is awareness that there's need for it.
well, i may be aware.
but i may not want to change.
being self-aware is only important to me in as much as it allows me to soften my rough edges a bit
or to decide which way to react or to act (in certain scenarios)
its a self-preservation thing.
wintry mournings
winter is delegated as the last season...but it depends on perception really. just like a person who grows old but refuses to admit that she have in fact, grown really old. take myself for example, at the ripe old age of twentysix and will be turning twentyseven in six months, i already feel the need to sometimes lie about my age. or refuse to answer the question inevitably asked quite too often; "how old are you?" (ie: A 7 year old, Welsh gentleman, named Collin asked this to me when he sat beside me on the #12 bus on my way home from school just before Christmas break begun.. Mind you he was very proper and offered his own age before asking mine, it went like this: " I'm seven how about you?" To which I smilingly replied; "Would you want to take a guess?' and he did. Amazingly, his first guess was 'thirteen'.)
now i face admitting that I'm indeed growing 'wintry'(ok, i coined this term to fit here...in this usage it means old) by listing down the Top 5 signs that I've grown up. Here goes everything...
Top 5 : I've started to take my own health as my own responsibility.
Gone were the days when I would run away from home for dear life when my Mum threatened to inject me with the 3rd installment of the Hepatitis B vaccine. Just last March, without anybody prodding me, and purely of my own accord I went to have my own vaccine of Anti-flu which guarantee that you won't be infected with it (the flu, i mean) for a whole uncompromising year.
I've also had a phobic relationship with ANY dentist for as long as I can remember. I hate (with a passion) to have someone drilling into my mouth as I hold it wide open helplessly for what seem like a lifetime (and salivate profusely during the whole painstaking process), where I end up going home without any feeling on my gums in my whole mouth that I don't realize that I've been drooling on my jeepney ride back home. But lately, I've began braving it and right before I left, I went to a dentist for an oral hygiene checkup (to which I passed with flying colours) and ended up just having a routine prophylaxis.
I don't disregard any mild pain I feel anywhere in my body anymore. I've taken care of my recurring illnesses like my acidity (ulcers) and UTI to the point of healing completely. I now have a fixation of flossing, a lot. Personal hygiene and health has become a priority. This is a sure sign that I've grown old because I now know that no one would take care of myself other than me. (sabi nga nila, ito ang puhunan ko) that's why I don't fancy the thought of anything happening to it and I'm now actively trying my best to be sure that nothing would.
Top 4 : I've begun to realize the value of saving.
OK. No one might believe me. Because I still spend a lot. But I really have. Saving would guarantee that I can look forward to a reasonably bearable advanced winter. (ie. advanced old age)
Top 3 : My insomnia have grown worse.
This I believe is a really good sign that I've grown old because long after Mavic has been snoring for a good one hour... I would still be pondering on the 'inevitable/s' of my life. I now think that as people grow old, it gets quite harder to fall asleep because my mind goes into frantic frenzy as I lie in bed. (this could just be me. but as a look upon Mavic enviously, I know that when I was her age it wasn't this hard to fall asleep) Well, there are two main reasons that I can think of which could have aggravated this, though...#1 is my long stint in call centres that forced me to condition myself to be fully aware at night (which caused my biological clock to go irrevocably hay-wired). #2 reason could be my fierce addiction with caffeine (coffee and tea alike). They said this causes nerves...so could it be that the 'nerves' they keep talking about it true? and it just so happen that it programmed itself to pester me at night?
Top 2 : I now have tolerance. (this evaded me before) And longer patience.
This is for most things. Every time I feel annoyance I now have the capacity to take a deep breath and slowly turn around. I now pick my battles to those that are worth the effort of fighting. I can now keep my mouth closed if I have nothing good to say. I can now smile bravely everytime life turns sour and become almost unbearable and simply wait it out.
Well, maybe there is awareness in me that's enough to make me consciously choose where to apply this claim for tolerance and patience. Because there's still a part of me that believes that there are times when it is still much more sophisticated to give up, turn around and walk away as compared to sticking it out.
Top 1 : The number 1 sign that I've grown seriously old is: I am now able to appreciate the things in my life that I used to ignore or just simply does not see. I cant explain this fully though. It's just that I'm now very aware of occurrences, things and even people that used to be nonexistent. It really is surreal and weird but its hilarious just the same.
now i face admitting that I'm indeed growing 'wintry'(ok, i coined this term to fit here...in this usage it means old) by listing down the Top 5 signs that I've grown up. Here goes everything...
Top 5 : I've started to take my own health as my own responsibility.
Gone were the days when I would run away from home for dear life when my Mum threatened to inject me with the 3rd installment of the Hepatitis B vaccine. Just last March, without anybody prodding me, and purely of my own accord I went to have my own vaccine of Anti-flu which guarantee that you won't be infected with it (the flu, i mean) for a whole uncompromising year.
I've also had a phobic relationship with ANY dentist for as long as I can remember. I hate (with a passion) to have someone drilling into my mouth as I hold it wide open helplessly for what seem like a lifetime (and salivate profusely during the whole painstaking process), where I end up going home without any feeling on my gums in my whole mouth that I don't realize that I've been drooling on my jeepney ride back home. But lately, I've began braving it and right before I left, I went to a dentist for an oral hygiene checkup (to which I passed with flying colours) and ended up just having a routine prophylaxis.
I don't disregard any mild pain I feel anywhere in my body anymore. I've taken care of my recurring illnesses like my acidity (ulcers) and UTI to the point of healing completely. I now have a fixation of flossing, a lot. Personal hygiene and health has become a priority. This is a sure sign that I've grown old because I now know that no one would take care of myself other than me. (sabi nga nila, ito ang puhunan ko) that's why I don't fancy the thought of anything happening to it and I'm now actively trying my best to be sure that nothing would.
Top 4 : I've begun to realize the value of saving.
OK. No one might believe me. Because I still spend a lot. But I really have. Saving would guarantee that I can look forward to a reasonably bearable advanced winter. (ie. advanced old age)
Top 3 : My insomnia have grown worse.
This I believe is a really good sign that I've grown old because long after Mavic has been snoring for a good one hour... I would still be pondering on the 'inevitable/s' of my life. I now think that as people grow old, it gets quite harder to fall asleep because my mind goes into frantic frenzy as I lie in bed. (this could just be me. but as a look upon Mavic enviously, I know that when I was her age it wasn't this hard to fall asleep) Well, there are two main reasons that I can think of which could have aggravated this, though...#1 is my long stint in call centres that forced me to condition myself to be fully aware at night (which caused my biological clock to go irrevocably hay-wired). #2 reason could be my fierce addiction with caffeine (coffee and tea alike). They said this causes nerves...so could it be that the 'nerves' they keep talking about it true? and it just so happen that it programmed itself to pester me at night?
Top 2 : I now have tolerance. (this evaded me before) And longer patience.
This is for most things. Every time I feel annoyance I now have the capacity to take a deep breath and slowly turn around. I now pick my battles to those that are worth the effort of fighting. I can now keep my mouth closed if I have nothing good to say. I can now smile bravely everytime life turns sour and become almost unbearable and simply wait it out.
Well, maybe there is awareness in me that's enough to make me consciously choose where to apply this claim for tolerance and patience. Because there's still a part of me that believes that there are times when it is still much more sophisticated to give up, turn around and walk away as compared to sticking it out.
Top 1 : The number 1 sign that I've grown seriously old is: I am now able to appreciate the things in my life that I used to ignore or just simply does not see. I cant explain this fully though. It's just that I'm now very aware of occurrences, things and even people that used to be nonexistent. It really is surreal and weird but its hilarious just the same.
Friday 4 January 2008
family feud
my top 5 funniest family moments :
Top 5 : ate janelle, chelsea, mavic, gka, mikee dancing 'tiny bubbles'
- a few Christmas eves ago and the kids are really very young and we can still make them sing and dance for a few bucks.
- complete with grass skirt costumes galore. ate janelle was the requisite choreographer and practice sessions start as early as april during the summer vacation
* ok, funny din ung lahat kme sumasayaw ng ocho ocho
Top 4 : everytime papa insists that mixing all leftover and almost rotten veggies in the fridge and insisting that they will make for a very tasty soup together (basta igisa sa bawang at sibuyas)
- this happens a lot, even now.. even more hilarious if he also insists na dapat ako ang magluto nitong pinaghalo-halong gulay na ito.
Top 3 : when mommy broke to mavic, hydz and me that she already have work permit to go to the UK (during that time it was not very funny)
- i find it funny now that i recall it because all of us had burst into tears. very 'maalaala mo kaya' moment.
- it is even funnier because we didn't even know during that time that she was actively applying anywhere to leave the country
Top 2 : just last night when we were perusing hyds' multiply account and papa said;
" patinging nga...ang payat na ni heidi, si heidi ang pinakamaganda kong anak eh."
mavic and me are right beside him and chose to ignore his comment.
Then mommy whose also beside me said "hay naku victor, manahimik ka nga jan. kung anu ano nanaman sinasabi mo."
and she sounded really annoyed. And I said that; " mommy, please, wag mo na kasi pinapatulan si papa, alam mo na nga na ganyan na sya eh, patol ka pa ng patol."
we all laughed. it's true my parents love to bicker 'cause my papa always says these things to get a reaction from mummy...which she readily obliges to. it really is endearingly funny, can't help but love them, right? :)
Top 1 :
During the time last year that I was working on my papers to apply for my visa. I enlisted the help of everyone in my family because i was going seriously mad. I was not myself half of the time due to exhaustion. (since i was working 12 hours most days 7 days a week usually on night shift) and i have to do the papers in the morning dahil un lang ang available time ko. and i wanted to leave for the SY 07-08.
grabe. it's hilarious how crazy i've become during that time. i knew i was a walking zombie who was also partly demented. but i pulled it through mostly because of the help of my family. and for their help i am eternally grateful:
- si mommy kasi she went to Llandrillo college and paid £1000 for my tuition, hehe. kala ko talaga pag nalaman nya kung magkano ung down mgba-back out na sya eh
- si papa kasi paulit ulit nyang inexplain sakin kung anu dapat gawin ko during my flight para hnd ako maligaw at mapunta sa iraq
- si nanay, dahil walang sawa sya na i-welcome ako tumambay sa bahay niya nung time na nghihintay ako ng result, hinuhulaan nya pa nga ako sa solitario eh
- si tita neneng, kasi ng-effort pa sya puntahan ang bestfriend nya sa may-mrt central station para sa referral letter ko
- si tito jhun, dahil lumabas pa sya ng office para pautangin ako ng 10k kasi i need it in 20 minutes dahil palpak ang BPI salcedo branch dun sa unang payment ko. at hnd naman ako makapag-cash advance sa Credit card nun dahil hnd ko kabisado ang pin number
- si tito eric, lagi nya ko hinahatid sa work kahit alanganing oras at pinapatibay ang hope ko
- si tita flor super tiyaga sa paghahanda ng food and sinamahan nya pa ko sa embassy
- si mikee at gka kasi inaaliw nila ko para hnd ako masyadong mabaliw
- si nica, sa pag-f-flute nya at pagpayag na maging demure
- si janelle kc sinamahan nya ko sa Ateneo bookshop para bumili ng folder for my papers
- si hyds bru, kasi sya ang permanent movie date ko. at pumapayag na hilain ko at i-bad influence kong mg-malling kahit na me class sya.
- at lahat sila, na pumunta sa bahay ni nanay nung day ng pagalis ko. grabe i know their time is precious and sobrang touch ako that they came to send me off. pinalakas nila ang loob ko. gravve!
everytime i remember those days leading to my departure. i can't help but smile, it was such a bizarre phase and i made it through 'coz my family kept me smiling and laughing in between the crazy patches
Top 5 : ate janelle, chelsea, mavic, gka, mikee dancing 'tiny bubbles'
- a few Christmas eves ago and the kids are really very young and we can still make them sing and dance for a few bucks.
- complete with grass skirt costumes galore. ate janelle was the requisite choreographer and practice sessions start as early as april during the summer vacation
* ok, funny din ung lahat kme sumasayaw ng ocho ocho
Top 4 : everytime papa insists that mixing all leftover and almost rotten veggies in the fridge and insisting that they will make for a very tasty soup together (basta igisa sa bawang at sibuyas)
- this happens a lot, even now.. even more hilarious if he also insists na dapat ako ang magluto nitong pinaghalo-halong gulay na ito.
Top 3 : when mommy broke to mavic, hydz and me that she already have work permit to go to the UK (during that time it was not very funny)
- i find it funny now that i recall it because all of us had burst into tears. very 'maalaala mo kaya' moment.
- it is even funnier because we didn't even know during that time that she was actively applying anywhere to leave the country
Top 2 : just last night when we were perusing hyds' multiply account and papa said;
" patinging nga...ang payat na ni heidi, si heidi ang pinakamaganda kong anak eh."
mavic and me are right beside him and chose to ignore his comment.
Then mommy whose also beside me said "hay naku victor, manahimik ka nga jan. kung anu ano nanaman sinasabi mo."
and she sounded really annoyed. And I said that; " mommy, please, wag mo na kasi pinapatulan si papa, alam mo na nga na ganyan na sya eh, patol ka pa ng patol."
we all laughed. it's true my parents love to bicker 'cause my papa always says these things to get a reaction from mummy...which she readily obliges to. it really is endearingly funny, can't help but love them, right? :)
Top 1 :
During the time last year that I was working on my papers to apply for my visa. I enlisted the help of everyone in my family because i was going seriously mad. I was not myself half of the time due to exhaustion. (since i was working 12 hours most days 7 days a week usually on night shift) and i have to do the papers in the morning dahil un lang ang available time ko. and i wanted to leave for the SY 07-08.
grabe. it's hilarious how crazy i've become during that time. i knew i was a walking zombie who was also partly demented. but i pulled it through mostly because of the help of my family. and for their help i am eternally grateful:
- si mommy kasi she went to Llandrillo college and paid £1000 for my tuition, hehe. kala ko talaga pag nalaman nya kung magkano ung down mgba-back out na sya eh
- si papa kasi paulit ulit nyang inexplain sakin kung anu dapat gawin ko during my flight para hnd ako maligaw at mapunta sa iraq
- si nanay, dahil walang sawa sya na i-welcome ako tumambay sa bahay niya nung time na nghihintay ako ng result, hinuhulaan nya pa nga ako sa solitario eh
- si tita neneng, kasi ng-effort pa sya puntahan ang bestfriend nya sa may-mrt central station para sa referral letter ko
- si tito jhun, dahil lumabas pa sya ng office para pautangin ako ng 10k kasi i need it in 20 minutes dahil palpak ang BPI salcedo branch dun sa unang payment ko. at hnd naman ako makapag-cash advance sa Credit card nun dahil hnd ko kabisado ang pin number
- si tito eric, lagi nya ko hinahatid sa work kahit alanganing oras at pinapatibay ang hope ko
- si tita flor super tiyaga sa paghahanda ng food and sinamahan nya pa ko sa embassy
- si mikee at gka kasi inaaliw nila ko para hnd ako masyadong mabaliw
- si nica, sa pag-f-flute nya at pagpayag na maging demure
- si janelle kc sinamahan nya ko sa Ateneo bookshop para bumili ng folder for my papers
- si hyds bru, kasi sya ang permanent movie date ko. at pumapayag na hilain ko at i-bad influence kong mg-malling kahit na me class sya.
- at lahat sila, na pumunta sa bahay ni nanay nung day ng pagalis ko. grabe i know their time is precious and sobrang touch ako that they came to send me off. pinalakas nila ang loob ko. gravve!
everytime i remember those days leading to my departure. i can't help but smile, it was such a bizarre phase and i made it through 'coz my family kept me smiling and laughing in between the crazy patches
Thursday 3 January 2008
a bit of tantrum
annoying things
- for sake of argument (with myself, that is) i'm doing the top 5 things that can annoy me (or maybe you) on any given day
5. missing a show you've been waiting to see - really.
i remember that i was waiting to watch 'Four Weddings and A Funeral' and i connived with my sister mavic to wait for it...only to fall asleep before it was shown. (it was a month ago around 11:45 pm) still haven't seen the film now.
4. sudden change of plans - of course.
- although changing of plans happens a lot. it could be really frustrating especially if you had prepared a lot for it or u were actually looking forward to it. can't give an example though 'coz there's way too much.
3. missing your bus.. like when u were running in the rain to catch it (without hood or umbrella) and the temperature is freezing and you're drenched and really, really, cold and you get to your stop and the bus just left. seriously. seriously!
2. waiting for someone. you arrive first. you start to wait. 15 minutes later - still no sign. no text. enough said.
(*to anybody reading this.. its rude to make someone wait without giving them any holler whatsoever.)
for the top spot... 1. having a bad hair day. funny you may think. then wait until your next one. :)
- for sake of argument (with myself, that is) i'm doing the top 5 things that can annoy me (or maybe you) on any given day
5. missing a show you've been waiting to see - really.
i remember that i was waiting to watch 'Four Weddings and A Funeral' and i connived with my sister mavic to wait for it...only to fall asleep before it was shown. (it was a month ago around 11:45 pm) still haven't seen the film now.
4. sudden change of plans - of course.
- although changing of plans happens a lot. it could be really frustrating especially if you had prepared a lot for it or u were actually looking forward to it. can't give an example though 'coz there's way too much.
3. missing your bus.. like when u were running in the rain to catch it (without hood or umbrella) and the temperature is freezing and you're drenched and really, really, cold and you get to your stop and the bus just left. seriously. seriously!
2. waiting for someone. you arrive first. you start to wait. 15 minutes later - still no sign. no text. enough said.
(*to anybody reading this.. its rude to make someone wait without giving them any holler whatsoever.)
for the top spot... 1. having a bad hair day. funny you may think. then wait until your next one. :)
Wednesday 2 January 2008
...an apple a day...
the title have absolutely nothing to do with what i have in mind right now.
what i have in mind is quite unhealthy actually, in some aspects... ok before u get any ideas; let me get to the point. it's getting quite bumming to be missing stuff from back home like;
1. California maki from Tokyo Tokyo - i tell u, u won't get a decent sushi where i am.. even the one from marks looks forced
2. iced blended white chocolate dream of Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf - its simply the most sinfully satisfying coffee you'll ever have the opportunity of ingesting
3. the calzone from Yellow Cab - love the mozzarella, love the ham, love the peppers...luv it.
4. Chicago deep pizza from Sbarro - yup, don't ask why i weight like this
5. chicken a 'la king at French Baker - creamy...yummmmmmyyy...
and this is just a few of them ...
ok...
'nuff said.
what i really am celebrating are the discoveries i've already made here. these are the top 5 discoveries i've made so far:
5. red wine. white wine. - i haven't had much alcohol for almost half a year...i've vowed to stay away really, but when i got here i realized not all alcoholic beverage has the same dizzying effect... in moderation, this gives a warm fuzzy feeling and promises a deep satisfying slumber ( ZZZZzzzzzzzzzz....)
4. orange/yellow light VS. 'd fluorescent light - i wasn't keen on it because i love to read but still want to protect my eyes, and i was so used to the white thing ... but now, i realized that it's relaxing and makes your skin glow, good for picture taking hehehe :)
3. kiwi fruit - give this a chance. it's not very popular but it is, as my father keeps on insisting the most nutritious of all fruits,
truth is i doubt it's true but for me, the selling point is on the joy of slowly peeling it and then being greeted with this really pleasant green colour
and when you slice it, it just looks so pretty with the tiny-tiny black seeds,
go ahead... take a bite. it's just soooo
refreshingly sweet and pleasantly sour at the same time
2. 2nd to the top is Marks & Spencers' perfume called Photograph
- im pretty sure they have it at M&S shops back home but i just recently discovered it. i really like the light fresh scent, it's not too sweet and not too fruity.. it's just right. especially when you're going for the dainty, innocent effect. and at £12 per 100ml, easy on the purse as well
1. and the top one... tanananana!
Tea tree oil foaming face wash from the body shop. again...there is definitely one at body shop stores back home but i took notice just now.. see im having face maintenance problems lately (alternate exposure to bitter cold weather and hot air from electric heaters is to take the blame for icky breakouts) and there is no respectable facial salon anywhere near me (big dilemma, i know), but this is a miracle worker. really.
of course u still have to use the toner and moisturizer but this face wash is a must!
ok. it doesn't seem that it amount to much, right?
but the uncovering of these simple treasures have only just begun
who knows what else is out there? :) i'm keeping my fingers crossed.
what i have in mind is quite unhealthy actually, in some aspects... ok before u get any ideas; let me get to the point. it's getting quite bumming to be missing stuff from back home like;
1. California maki from Tokyo Tokyo - i tell u, u won't get a decent sushi where i am.. even the one from marks looks forced
2. iced blended white chocolate dream of Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf - its simply the most sinfully satisfying coffee you'll ever have the opportunity of ingesting
3. the calzone from Yellow Cab - love the mozzarella, love the ham, love the peppers...luv it.
4. Chicago deep pizza from Sbarro - yup, don't ask why i weight like this
5. chicken a 'la king at French Baker - creamy...yummmmmmyyy...
and this is just a few of them ...
ok...
'nuff said.
what i really am celebrating are the discoveries i've already made here. these are the top 5 discoveries i've made so far:
5. red wine. white wine. - i haven't had much alcohol for almost half a year...i've vowed to stay away really, but when i got here i realized not all alcoholic beverage has the same dizzying effect... in moderation, this gives a warm fuzzy feeling and promises a deep satisfying slumber ( ZZZZzzzzzzzzzz....)
4. orange/yellow light VS. 'd fluorescent light - i wasn't keen on it because i love to read but still want to protect my eyes, and i was so used to the white thing ... but now, i realized that it's relaxing and makes your skin glow, good for picture taking hehehe :)
3. kiwi fruit - give this a chance. it's not very popular but it is, as my father keeps on insisting the most nutritious of all fruits,
truth is i doubt it's true but for me, the selling point is on the joy of slowly peeling it and then being greeted with this really pleasant green colour
and when you slice it, it just looks so pretty with the tiny-tiny black seeds,
go ahead... take a bite. it's just soooo
refreshingly sweet and pleasantly sour at the same time
2. 2nd to the top is Marks & Spencers' perfume called Photograph
- im pretty sure they have it at M&S shops back home but i just recently discovered it. i really like the light fresh scent, it's not too sweet and not too fruity.. it's just right. especially when you're going for the dainty, innocent effect. and at £12 per 100ml, easy on the purse as well
1. and the top one... tanananana!
Tea tree oil foaming face wash from the body shop. again...there is definitely one at body shop stores back home but i took notice just now.. see im having face maintenance problems lately (alternate exposure to bitter cold weather and hot air from electric heaters is to take the blame for icky breakouts) and there is no respectable facial salon anywhere near me (big dilemma, i know), but this is a miracle worker. really.
of course u still have to use the toner and moisturizer but this face wash is a must!
ok. it doesn't seem that it amount to much, right?
but the uncovering of these simple treasures have only just begun
who knows what else is out there? :) i'm keeping my fingers crossed.
first things first
It is indeed the very first day of the year, but sometimes i feel new year's day is just a tad overrated. i mean, it could be just me... but seriously nothing really stops on the 31st day of December. So why do people make resolutions and go into hiatus in making sure the celebration is special? Or is this just culture thing?
Or is this just ultimately me, growing really old? (and cynical?)
It's just a thought really. I just feel that everything carries over to the next year anyway, unless... we decide that it will not so.
we still carry on doing the same old job,
we still watch the same TV shows,
we still listen to the same music that came out in November...
(in some people's cases they'd still be dating the same person, or still married to the same person)
wouldn't it be surreal if new year does bring forth changes on the very first day?
imagine waking up on January 1 of 2009 knowing that you will be starting a new job... listening to entirely new songs on the way to that job...
and when you come home it's actually a new house;
TV shows will also be new and you have a new partner to go home to as well...
oooohhh...scary isn't it?
i think what i ultimately want to say is, i wish the need to celebrate the new year every year wouldn't be such a big deal, because in reality, it stresses me out -- in a really profound way. and it would be nice not to worry about celebrating. now, THAT, will ultimately give me something new to celebrate about.
Or is this just ultimately me, growing really old? (and cynical?)
It's just a thought really. I just feel that everything carries over to the next year anyway, unless... we decide that it will not so.
we still carry on doing the same old job,
we still watch the same TV shows,
we still listen to the same music that came out in November...
(in some people's cases they'd still be dating the same person, or still married to the same person)
wouldn't it be surreal if new year does bring forth changes on the very first day?
imagine waking up on January 1 of 2009 knowing that you will be starting a new job... listening to entirely new songs on the way to that job...
and when you come home it's actually a new house;
TV shows will also be new and you have a new partner to go home to as well...
oooohhh...scary isn't it?
i think what i ultimately want to say is, i wish the need to celebrate the new year every year wouldn't be such a big deal, because in reality, it stresses me out -- in a really profound way. and it would be nice not to worry about celebrating. now, THAT, will ultimately give me something new to celebrate about.
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